anything but this

Today, November something-or-other

Just a quick update…I think my gram and I are both totally worn out. She’s been trying to sort thru her old mail in an effort to contribute to the clean sweep, or impress me with her super human gramma abilities, but for now she’s in her room napping! Poor thing, she wants so badly to do something, she will wear herself out while I’m here trying to keep up. I love her so much, she’s been my rock over the years. I just wish she wasn’t so damn stubborn…I guess it’s inherited. *coughcough*

I have been working in my mom’s room today, that is, the part of the day that I haven’t been dilly-dallying around trying to AVOID working in her room! Two problems with that; one, it’s a lot of junk to go thru and two, when I’m done there it’ll be time to move out in to the (<–SEE WHAT I HAVE TO LOOK FORWARD TO) garage more or less…ugh. Not really looking forward to that although that seems to be the part gram wants done more than anything. I hope I find her Bible in there somewhere, she’s been pining for it for years. And I hope I find her paintings too, they’ve been MIA for at least 5-6 years. . .I want to bring one or two home to frame. She was a fantastic self-taught oil painter. Beautiful scenery that was just breathtaking, she shakes so much now she can hardly hold a pen let alone a brush and paint.

Grams suffered from Parkinson’s and Diabetes along with a few other health and weight issues for a many years and it’s getting worse…she’s probably just a short road away from Alzheimer’s as well, her memory slips past her often and we don’t know if it’s the Parkinson’s or Alzheimer’s. Either way it’s a shame to see someone you love and know so well turn into a stranger right before your eyes. It makes me sad. I’ve found so many things that she wrote years ago, she had the most elegant handwriting. I always admired her penmanship. And then I get angry about the way they live now, it should be different for her…she told me the other night that this is NOT how she imagined growing old. What could I say to that? I just turned my head as a tear slid down out of sight.

And my mom’s room is simply plaguing me, out of the 5 boxes I have sorted, 4 of them have been full of old mail, catalogs and trash! I’m seriously getting fed up with this sh*t. I feel nausea coming on…maybe its all the dust and dirt I’m kicking up, maybe it’s because the heaters on too high, maybe it’s because I don’t have my shit waders on to get thru the pigsty…one may never know. Maybe I just need to eat. I hardly think that a latte, a slice of coffee cake, a bologna sandwich and some peanut butter slapped on a piece of bread is enough to sustain my energy with all the calories I’ve burned today! Perhaps I’ll wrap up the mess for tonight, load up the car for my morning donation delivery and make some soup for me and the ol’ lady *hahaha* She does love some soup!

Anywho, I guess I’m down griping for now…back to the job at hand, cause it aint gonna clean itself!


Relax. Breathe. Focus.


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